Who Told You That You Need to Be Beautiful

Who told you that you need to be beautiful?

I, like many women in today's society, believe that I need to be beautiful. I need to put my best face forward, and be polished. I need to wear makeup and get my hair done. I need to smile and look pretty to get a good job. But who told me I needed to be beautiful? Where did it all start?

For some of us, it starts at home, I know it did for me. My mother grew up in South Korea, where beauty is of high importance. In fact, South Korea is the cosmetic surgery capital of the world. Personal appearance is extremely important, and women especially are judged if they don't fit the mold. Women display their success by adorning themselves with designer clothing and accessories paired with smooth, flawless skin, and sleek hair. Powerful women are synonymous with that certain look, the size zero beauty who is poised and elegant. It is very stereotypical and portrayed as such in numerous K-dramas. The South Korean beauty standard is very high, which explains why it is the plastic surgery capital of the world. It is no wonder that my mom, being born in South Korea, has passed along these high beauty expectations to me. I grew up struggling to be thin and pretty, which lead to depression and eating disorders in my late teenage years. Later, my struggle turned into rebellion by going against the what was considered in fashion and dying my hair crazy colors before it became trendy.

But who determines what beauty is? Our current beauty standard is not determined by us as women, but by the capitalist patriarchal society we currently live in. A misogynistic society where women are hyper-sexualized and intelligence and character are not as important as appearance. Even successful women need to ensure they have the right clothes, hair, and makeup for people to listen to them. It is not profitable for society to tell women, truly tell them, that they are beautiful just the way they are. Who would buy the newest fashion, support the trendiest beauty craze, or splurge on the most innovative plastic surgery if women grew up thinking that there was nothing wrong with our bodies and were beautiful from the moment we were created? Women in America, on average, spend more money on fashion and beauty than on education. But how does society communicate this idea of beauty to the masses? The media.

We are constantly bombarded with images of what beauty is through the media where a woman's worth is based on her appearance. We are flooded with images of superficial women, often altered either with cosmetic surgery or by computers, and told that this is what beauty is. Young women grow up thinking that these unnatural, objectified images of women are what they should strive for, and their self worth is only in their appearance; I know I did.

Beauty is so much more than the images that we see on TV or the internet. Beauty goes deeper than anything superficial. One day I hope that the capitalist patriarchal media will stop objectifying and hyper-sexualizing women, placing their self worth solely on their appearance. I challenge you to question your idea of beauty. Who told you that you need to be beautiful?

Thought provoking question from Ali Kamenova on her YouTube post about how beauty is defined in today's society. You can view it here